The Inner Critic
By Christine Ferch
What is the Inner Critic or Negative Inner Voice? It’s that voice inside that is mostly negative.
Ever have those days when you just cannot shake that little negative voice in your head saying what you are capable of? Letting you know something is not perfect or that you can do better?
There are times when this little voice is useful. However, our “inner critic” can also have a significant impact on our thoughts, their process and how we feel about ourselves. This negative begins to drive itself into our standard thought process, we can go from thinking positively, to thinking negatively and begin to ruminate (see blog Apr 26, 2020). These thoughts can appear at any time, under any circumstance or situation ranging from our personal traits, our environment, and our relationships.
Our inner voice stems from early childhood experiences were hurtful attitudes, and expression of our capabilities was negatively imposed on us. Our parents, teachers or others in our environments may have displayed belittling beliefs or statements to us, which formed our current style of thinking. Their voice, in a sense, becomes our inner critic.
When we are unable to identify we have engaged in this style of thinking, it shapes our thoughts, feelings and behaviours. We can become self-destructive and self-sabotaging as we believe we are not capable of accomplishing the goals we have.
To dissipate the inner critic, we must become mindful or aware our inner critic is creeping in, and we need to challenge it. Challenging the inner critic takes time. You are rearranging the inner critic voice from those of the past to your voice for the future. Controlling the inner critic can provide empowerment, goal accomplishment, a start to positive thinking and feeling more grounded with the self.
Here are some tricks to curb the inner critic :
- Challenge the thought: is their proof I am a failure, have I accomplished this task before in the past, do I have the skills to carry out this task. Find some evidence the thought is inaccurate when this is completed, it is easier to quiet that inner critic
- Engage in positive self-talk: Challenging the negative thought is most effective when we can replace the inner critic with positive self-talk. Build yourself up with positive self-statements, it may seem cheesy at first, but no one will know you are doing this!
- Your inner critic is different from your actual point of view, become aware of this. Our inner voice stems from a destructive past, not what lies within your current reality and your future. This voice is not your internalized self, it is a voice of someone else’s perspective
- Write down what your inner critic is stating and rephrase it in a positive light completed in I-statements. Doing this allows you to reconnect with your personal inner critic, which naturally tells us to keep moving forward.
- Also, write down the statements in the form of “you statements“. You become anonymous and has no attachment to the self. The visual allows for identifying how false the statement is.
I hope these suggestions have been helpful! In addition to this blog, there is another directly on positive self-talk. Happy reading!!
If you have any questions, you can email us at admin@ovcs.ca
