About Grief and Loss
This section looks at grief, and how it impacts individuals. Grief is a natural process, but it can be not only overwhelming for some but also devastating. Our article can help you to better understand grief and loss, what to do after someone dies, how to help others who have lost someone or something, cover what you can do to help yourself, and what you can do to help others.
Grief is incredibly hard to experience, which is why it’s important to remind those who are grieving that things will be okay and provide them with hope in spite of the pain. This is where quotes can be a great asset to share with someone you know who is grieving and has suffered a loss. Send them a text or email with that quote. Not only are you letting them know they are in your thoughts, but you’re giving them a sense of comfort through powerful words that can really touch their heart — especially at this crucial moment in time.
For some of us, grief and loss will be one of the more crushing and distressing experience we may ever go through. In particular, grief is what we may feel when someone we care about or that is close to us passes away. Not everyone experiences grief the same way and there is no ‘normal’ or ‘right’ way to grieve. Here are some things that may come up when you lose someone:
- What to do after someone dies
- Feelings when someone dies
- How to help someone bereaved
- Supporting yourself
- Children’s grief
- Coping and adapting
- Anniversaries and reminders when you are bereaved
- Bereavement at work
“The reality is that you will grieve forever. You will not ‘get over’ the loss of a loved one; you will learn to live with it. You will heal and you will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered. You will be whole again but you will never be the same. Nor should you be the same nor would you want to.” — Elisabeth Kubler-Ross
What To Do After Someone Dies
Immediately after a death – practical matters
After someone close to you dies, you may feel numerous feelings from being numb, angry, alone, sad, or other intense emotions. This is completely normal to go through a many feelings and not always be able to identify how you’re feeling in the days after a death. There are some practical issues though that may need your attention. Some of these may include the following:
When someone dies there are three practical things that need to be done in the first few days:
- Get a medical certificate – you’ll get this from a doctor (GP or at a hospital). You need the certificate& to register the death.
- Register the death within five days – you’ll then get the documents you need for the funeral.
- Arrange the funeral or ‘celebration of life’ – most people use a funeral director, but others may do it themselves.
There are useful government guides to how to do each step in British Columbia. Connect with this Guide here.
If you need support during these early days it’s important to ask for help. Talk to family or friends who might be able to offer practical assistance, as well as emotional support. If you’re not wanting to burden your family members or just want to a professional to speak to please call us at our (toll-free phone number) 1.877.215.7759 or email us at admin@ovcs.ca.
Death at Home
Move the deceased to a Funeral Home, if the death occurred at home, the coroner will advise the family when the deceased may be transferred to the funeral home. If an Expected Death at Home form was previously filed by an attending physician or nurse practitioner, the body may be moved by a funeral director without the need for a coroner. The only person who can allow a funeral director to move the body is either the representative named in the will, or, if there is not a will, the person authorized by section 5(1) of the Cremation, Interment and Funeral Services Act: Section 5 If requesting to take responsibility for a private transfer of remains to a funeral home, crematorium or cemetery, Consumer Protection BC has information about the processes and permissions required.
Resources
Funeral home search: www.health.gov.bc.ca/cgi-bin/vs/funeral_homes.cgi
Immediate steps to take after a death: www.bcfunerals.com/public/when-death-occurs
Preparing for an expected death at home information: https://www2.gov.bc.ca/gov/content/health/accessinghealth-care/home-community-care/care-options-andcost/end-of-life-care/expected-planned-home-deaths
Private transfers information: https://www.consumerprotectionbc.ca/2014/10/optingfor-a-private-transfer-of-your-loved-one-to-a-funeralhome-crematorium-or-cemetery-if-you-have-questionshere-are-some-things-you-should-know/
Register the Death
Register the Death – Register a death through Vital Statistics Agency (Government of B.C.), or licensed funeral directors can register a death on your behalf.
https://www2.gov.bc.ca/gov/content/life-events/death/death-registration
Toll-free within B.C.: 1-888-876-1633 (In Victoria and outside B.C. 250-952-2681) Service BC locations: www.servicebc.gov.bc.ca/locations/
Get A Death Certificate
Documents Required for Registering a Death are a Medical Certification of Death (provided by a doctor or a coroner).Get A Death Certificate
Get the Death Certificate(s) – Request a death certificate through Vital Statistics Agency (Government of B.C.) or through a Funeral Director. A death certificate may be required by government agencies, insurance companies and other organizations as proof of a death. Anyone can order death certificates.
Resource
Toll-free within B.C.: 1-888-876-1633 (In Victoria and outside B.C. 250-952-2681) Service BC locations: www.servicebc.gov.bc.ca/locations/
If A Death is Sudden or Unexpected
Contact BC Coroners Service – If the death was sudden or unexpected and/or a coroner attended the scene of death, you may have questions about the death investigation process.
Resource
https://www2.gov.bc.ca/gov/content/life-events/death/coroners-service
Phone: 604-660-7745
In The First Few Weeks
Find the Will and Estate Information – Wills and estate Information: www2.gov.bc.ca/gov/content/life-events/death/wills
Resource
A will is a legal document that outlines a person’s wishes for their estate. Use a lawyer, especially if there are questions about the validity or interpretation of a will. For information: https://dialalaw.peopleslawschool.ca/category/life/willsplanning-estates
To find our if you qualify for legal aid: www.lss.bc.ca/legal_aid
Accessing free legal help information: www.accessprobono.ca/
Find out if the Will Needs to be Probated
Find out if the Will needs to be probated – Probate is the process of verifying a will is valid. Agencies and financial institutions that hold assets in an estate sometimes require that a will be probated. Seek legal advice if unsure whether a will must be probated.
Resource
Probating will information from Supreme Court of B.C.: www2.gov.bc.ca/gov/content/life-events/death/willsestates/probating-a-will
Complete A Search of Wills Notice
Complete a Search of Wills Notice – Vital Statistics Agency (Government of B.C.) If the will is subject to probate, the executor will need to submit a Search of Wills Notice as part of the application for probate.
Resource
For information: www2.gov.bc.ca/gov/content/lifeevents/death/wills-registry
Send a completed application to: Vital Statistics Agency PO Box 9657 Stn Prov Govt Victoria, B.C. V8W 9P3
Application can also be submitted to a Service BC location: www.servicebc.gov.bc.ca/locations/
Form: www2.gov.bc.ca/assets/gov/health/for ms/vital-statistics/vsa532_fill.pdf
Copy of Death Certificate
We hope you found this information helpful. If we can support you in your grief please let us know. We’d be happy to help. Email us at admin@ovcs.ca
